8 potential reasons why you’re not watching True Detective


I needed to get this off my chest after last nights episode: if you aren’t watching this show I don’t want to know you as a person.

Reasons why (you’re wrong and) aren’t watching True Detective:

  1. You don’t have HBO (and have never heard of the internet)
  2. You’re a mindless drone
  3. You say you don’t have any time to watch TV shows and also lie to people
  4. You still watch The Walking Dead on Sundays (See #2)
  5. You fear change
  6. You eat paint chips (See #4)
  7. You weren’t aware Alexandra Daddario shows her tits in it
  8. You weren’t aware Matthew McConnaghey* shows his tits in it

*I’m not looking up how to spell his name because I’m pretty sure no one knows.

Slingtown edit: I know that half of these reasons are directed at me, dude


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